As soon as this picture was snapped and saved it became one of those that will forever hold an essence of this particular week. The week of an enormous Jenny breakdown due to being completely overwhelmed, exhausted, and stretched. a breakdown full of the wondering why ?'s that plague my mind somedays, of that awful comparison scale that I jump on sometimes. J held me and listened, he gently talked to me, helping me fight. He let the tears soak his shirt and the words tumble out as I made sense of all that was fumbling around inside my mind and heart. It was one of "those" breakdowns -- the shaking sobs, the voice breaking words, the go-through-250-tissues type of breakdowns; but it was all rather wonderful in the end. It was rather wonderful because I understood myself better -- my sinful, helpless, needing Jesus ever hour self.
I keep doing this thing lately where I try to do everything, all the time, and be all things to all people, pushing the gas down hard on people-pleasing mode. And every time I do that, God brings me to my knees again. He reminds me of Psalm 23, 2 Corinthians 12:9, Lamentations 3:21-24, and Philippians 4:13. He teaches me to rest and stop rushing, to trust, to stop trying to control the outcomes, to realize (again) that, try as I might, my strength will never be enough to sustain me, and to accept and believe how deeply freeing it is to live in that. The whole "I think I can" principle shows it kinks in times like this. I was made to depend on Jesus.
"your grace is sufficient for me. your strength is made perfect when I am weak. all that I cling to I lay at your feet. your grace is sufficient for me" -- Shane and Shane
A few of my favorite things:
01 || The most comfortable lounge pants -- and under $20! -- Target Women's Sleep Pant: Gray Ice
02 || The Hape kids toys line is well-loved in our home, and the dollhouse kitchen set has miniatures of the kitchen set AK has -- adorable -- Hape All-Season Furnished Dollhouse
03 || Some of our good friends recommended Andrew Peterson's Wingfeather Saga to J a while back and he has plowed through the books. I just need to catch up -- The Wingfeather Saga: Book One
04 || You guys. This video. It's just really incredible and beautiful -- reactions when people hear for the first time
05 || I adore my friend, Julie, for many reasons. One of which is that we share a mutual love for all things food and all things fall. She shared this muffin recipe on her blog this week and you must try it -- Maple Pumpkin Muffins
06 || Also, my darling friend, Julie, is a gifted writer and I loved this blog post she shared today. She is so beautifully encouraging and she always, always reminds me to stop comparing myself and to be brave in my creativity, remembering that the ultimate prize is not that I "make it", but that I glorify Jesus -- What Makes Someone A Writer?
I sincerely hope that each one of you have a simply lovely weekend, dear ones. I'm just so grateful to be back here with you all.
Happiest of Fridays to you!